Dear brain – The plea

Dear Brain – Plea   Understanding the limits of my body started with the pain. Exempting from gym classes for me was the punishment. I loved to move, to run, to do gymnastics. Why not the pain save me from itselfbut I have to avoid the activities which I like and are pleasing to my […]

Earthquake

Earthquake   They didn’t tell you there was an earthquake, but somewhere else. Escarpment of physical pain encroaching the mental. I am hiding from people in the protection of solitude, while the invisible is collapsing around me. Pain is a subjective category, thus you don’t see it. Visually it is a fetal position. There, somewhere […]

Pain tourism

Pain tourism   In one of the dystopic dark future worlds, I would probably be a person who sells the experience of her menstrual period cramps to the interested adrenaline junkies HeavyPeriodPainCrapms generator would be a facility of the two rooms connected with electro conductors which would transmit electrical signals of the brain and muscle […]

SilentCrampsDisco

SilentCrampsDisco   Welcome back,we are still in one of the dark future universes. The same one has HeavyPeriodCramps facility. To add a bit more fun, we gonna include a silent cramps disco to it. Music will be made from the electro signals gathered in HeavyPeriodCramps facilities and translated into the noise. The volume and the […]

The longest minutes

The longest minutes   Eleven hours of heavy period pain.Everything below the neck hurts in a different way.The strongest painkillers are not working.Feeling trapped like a stranger inside my body.Can’t eat. Can’t sleep. Can’t rest. Just waiting for it to pass. In the fetal position mostly. Every now and then,the sharpest pain impulse is hitting […]

The match: Red card

The match: Red card   The pain scoresfrom the halfof the field.Goal. Nausea.Night. Vomiting.I wish to bewhere it is notin the morning.4 hours halftimeon the goal alone.Empty defense.Autopilot.Again fall.Without playersexchange. All alone. Defense outsideAttack insideThe same being Penalty kicksstraight intomy ruptured cyst.Knockout, fall downswearing loudlyRed card.Disqualificaiton it is. Defense outsideAttack insideThe same being New hours. […]

I am not here

I am not here   When the pain is inI am not hereI am trying to beas far from my bodyas possiblebut that’s not possiblebecause all thoughtssummon inone particular pointlower left parta knotIt erasesmy inside beingWith severe brutal impulsessayingwho is the bossYou can’t overcome iteasilyyou have to tame itlike a hungrywild animalwith shutting yourselfof that […]

First menarche – bugaboo under the bed

First menarche – bugaboo under the bed   Today when I am becoming a womanthe crucial momentthat boundary when you realizethat your bodyif you are a biological jinxwill cause you pain. Bingo!I became a womanat 11 years oldthe thinnest in classbut with sporty musculaturebeside me one girlwhich looked like thatso the future guysbut still boyspaid […]

The choreography of pain: Ballet

The choreography of pain: Ballet   Imagined circlesaround the black spotpossible torsionof the ovarymaybe it’s not happeningbut that is the feelingwhich causesa strong earthquakein all of my senses.Light is suddenlycutting insideof my eye sockets.Musical rhythmimpaling painfullythe basses in the centerof the circle of the acheThe skin is enormoussupersentsitive organescaping from the touchlike a palateis running […]

Catwalk

Catwalk   Try walking in my shoes, and my shoes are painful. This is not a catwalk, I repeat This is not a catwalk There is nothing shiny glamorous about the pain. I don’t want to wear it today, but I can’t take it off. I have to wait to be bare naked off the […]